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Sunday, December 27, 2009

We miss Mommy....

Ohhhhhhh do we miss Mommy.

Explanation...Kim has been gone since Saturday morning to take a quick trip to Florida to visit her ailing Grandfather and it was decided that the quick trip might be a bit of a test for Reese that we didn't really care to try. So....I stayed home. Whew....

Don't get me wrong, Reese has been an absolute joy all weekend but she is so very constant now....meaning, you can't even go to the bathroom without bringing her along to make sure she doesn't pull the TV down on top of her head. Let's begin with Saturday....

A weepy Kim takes off and gives me a kiss...I made her step out of the kitchen so Reese couldn't see her for MY sake when they left. Reese didn't realize anything had happened for about 10 minutes and then she crawls back into the Living room looking for Mumamamamaamama. No crying, no fits...just a little indecision about the whole thing but Daddy is here so that made it ok. I start by surveying the toyland before me and decide that boxes need opening and organization must begin in earnest. Reese proceeds to get right between my legs as I sit on the couch opening boxes that must be mandated by our government for the safety of our children and the torment of all parents. You can't even get into a Tickle Me Elmo without having wire cutters to cut these damn gray wires that are wrapped around poor Elmo's throat and then tied in some sadistic knot around this piece of plastic in the back. This is only after you cut open the sandwiched cardboard that is taped with NASA grade shuttle tape so as to prevent the in store removal of the aforementioned Elmo OR to prevent ever playing with the doll once one gets it home.

I think I opened about 10 major boxes with varying degrees of torment designed by someone who must be demon possessed. Publish this persons name...and I will do horrible things to them.

Reese plays for a while....time to eat. I plan the food, lay out the bottle, we're ready to go. Reese sits and is ready to eat.....and now we have flying Reesie pie. Not really but she flails her hands when anything gets in front of her thereby causing Apples and Prunes to go all over her face, PJs, and hair. Great. Clean up what I can, push through the meal while holding her hands down in a weak attempt at a straight jacket and then strip the baby to Shout out the stain. I change the diaper, put the little one in a new set of PJs (we're not going anywhere Saturday so we're dressing lazy) Shout the stain. Play for a bit, get to 10am....NAP TIME!!!!!!!

Oh thank you Jesus...Nap time. I love Nap time. She literally falls asleep in my arms with no fuss and I sit her in her little swing. IMMEDIATELY the phone rings. It's no one. Some damn telemarketer - that is breaking the law since we are on the no-call list - so I hang up. Then folks start calling to check on me......Hey...Reese is sleeping.....oh....uh....well, yeah...not anymore. Maybe thirty minutes if I was lucky. I didn't even have time to wash bottles or prep anything. No time to poop, no time to grab clothes, no time to do anything but breath for a minute and talk on the phone or dive on the phone like it was a live grenade anytime someone called.

I eat cookies for lunch. Yeah, I could have warmed up chili but I'm on the move. I finally start getting some stuff done around mid-day and Reese is in a little bit of a play mode so I can move about the house without my shadow. I wash bottles, clothes, fold clothes, open toys, put toys together, watch a minute of TV....then feed. Finally around 3pm Reese got ready for one heck of a nap. She slept for an hour and a half and I made it happen during that time. Ran the trash out to the can, used the can, made the bed, got all of the clothes down to wash, I mean I made it happen. Then Lance calls and asks if I would like to join them for dinner at Taco Mac....SURE!!!! I gets me out of the house. Yeah, yeah, It's a pain to do this by yourself but its worth it because you're OUT!

Reese wakes up, I alter the feeding schedule a little, we arrive at Taco Mac and she performs flawlessly. we had a good meal and I decide to venture off to BabiesRUs for some cabinet latches. I get there and decided not to bring in the buggy cover that we have....I'll just hold her.

I - one - forget that BabiesRUs is like an oven all the time. Two, that I'm heavily dressed (for BabiesRUs anyway). Three - that Reese is not the best at holding still, and four - that I have no idea what I REALLY need. After the amazing sauna / bicep workout at BRU, I get Reese back in the car....declare that I will NEVER do that again and move on home. (Buggies are your friend and the buggy cover is not that much of an issue.) And if anyone knows management at BRU...please tell them that pregnant women and dads frequent their stores and do NOT appreciate the heat set at 400 de-freaking-grees.

That folks, is just Saturday.......Sunday was a repeat except Daddy didn't take a bath. Reese wouldn't allow that. Daddy didn't use the bathroom in private....not even ONCE. My parents came by and aided with some extra eyes to make sure our little daredevil didn't try to jump off the couch. Reese took the shit of a lifetime...assplosion out onto the PJs, up the back and STUNK like dammit. She took a horrible nap late in the day and while she was excellent for my parents - she was awful once they left. She went into a DEFCON 4 whine, scream, spit, cry, mini tantrum. I think she was tired, hungry and just generally pissed but I swear I heard her coming into the kitchen saying mumamamamamamama. Yes Reesie...I know. I miss Mumamamama as well baby. Thank GOD she is coming home on Monday because she is sorely missed and appreciated.

I travel a decent amount and weekday trips are a sight different than the weekend. You feel trapped almost on the weekend. You need to get outside and move around...see other people. I do anyway. We usually go pretty hard but when its you....and only you....getting out makes less sense than you'd think it would. It's truly been a pleasure being Reese's only comfort or the past two days and she has really clung to me all weekend and I love that....but let me say to my wife....you are truly the glue that keeps this house together.

I'll never live up to the standard that you deserve and you still love me despite that. All my flaws...all my weaknesses....and you love me more and more every day. I'll never comprehend that but I guess I should just learn to appreciate it more and give back as much as I can to you.

Moms kick ass. And we miss our Kimmy/Mommy.

2 comments:

Tara said...

hilarious and super sweet.

Zane Hollingsworth said...

Good post. Your Sunday is why I fear children....