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Monday, February 8, 2010

Sick babies....

So how can I tell this story with compassion and my normal sense of humor??

(Disclaimer: I love my girls and I feel bad about poking fun but these are family moments that just happen so you might as well laugh versus cry.)

On Friday Kim came home and told me that our sitter's oldest boy had the stomach bug thats been floating around for a while and that we may end up seeing that manifest in Reese this weekend. did. Saturday morning I woke up to look at the monitor and see Reese sitting up in her bed and just seeming sort of out of it. I go in and do the normal Good Morning song that we sing to Reese and she really didn't smile all that big. I pick her up.....she yakked. Not big but vomit nonetheless. I sort of do the ucky baby hold and keep her away from my shirt and we walk in to see Mommy still sort of waking up. Notable! Reese had slept until 8am so I was shocked that she had slept in and then gotten sick....I figured the bug would have made her stir a little sooner.

So, we get up and start the day and feed Reese after the "episode" and move on. A little baby food and a little bottle and a little later.....erp. Projectile vomit all over her little walker that looks like a lion. It was pretty massive....applesauce and formula drip from the lion so Kim grabs Reese and I grab the lion. It needs a shower....and so does Reese. SOOOOOO we give Reese a little bath and clean her up and go through the motions and I clean up the "vomit slick" that Reese laid down and spray everything with Lysol and hope that we're peaking the hill. Oh, did I mention that the whole time this is going down I'm trying to install a new ceiling fan in the sunroom/playroom? I've got stuff all over the floor so anytime you move quickly you have to be capable of doing sprints around the debris field in the living room.

I climb back up the ladder and start to do some stuff only to catch wind of a HORRIBLE smell. Oh no...its coming from the other end diarrhea!!!! It stunk so damn bad! Let me explain....Have you ever smelled something that stunk so bad that it almost smelled hot? Does that make sense? I mean it smelled like something that was simmering in funk. Grab her up....take her back upstairs and get ready for the unveiling of one of Reese's worst diapers since she was born. WHOA!!!!!! Did it deliver!!!

Kim took charge but I was right there with her and it was horrendous.....then it happened. Kim got the juicy jaws. You know the feeling...that sudden burst of slobber before you get ready to erp....the mouth sweats, juicy jaws....both are pretty interchangable. They describe the situation to perfection. Kim was overcome with funk but her own stomach issues were setting in. Oh brother.

Reese's diaper looked like something our dogs have puked before. It was different colors, textures, was a pandora's box of poop. Kim was visably shaken...she has never done that before with one of Reese's diapers but her gut was in flux so it was highly expected. We clean up the lava filled cesspool strapped to Reese's bottom and go back down stairs to try another stab at normalcy.......sniff sniff....she's at it again!!!!! Well, not really. She had a little extra lava in her shorts and it was not an assplosion...thank you Tara for the term. We love it.....BAAAACK downstairs again and Kim starts folding clothes and I try to finish what I started....Kim succumbs (spelling?) to the stomach bug....she erps.

Not in the floor but she gallops into the bathroom and proceeds to cough and spit. That's her deal. She doesn't release the hounds so to speak but she just coughs and spits a bunch. Could it get any better? A sick wife...a sick daughter...

Well, we made it through the weekend without any major issues like Saturday morning......oh, until Sunday night. Right before bed, Reese turned into a puke fountain. She threw up all over Kim, all over the sofa, all over the little sofa was awful. It was quite scary to be honest but after speaking with a nurse today, she felt like we had probably fed her too much and she was just done with it. A small burp turned into a spit up that wouldn't stop. So today...we're slowing it down a little so the baby girl can eeeeeeaaaaassseee back into eating again. We think she's fine now and appears to have held down a small meal from tonight but in all seriousness, say a little prayer that Reese will get over this bug soon and we can stop washing towels by the hundreds after cleaning up the mess.

If you ever have the time to revisit an older movie from my youth..."Stand By Me" there was a scene in there from the pie eating contest....I felt like I was in that scene this weekend....I love my girls but I was actually glad this weekend was over. I'm ready for a new attempt and rest and relaxation.


Tara said...

hilarious. Man, we've all been there. I thank goodness for our leather sofas everyday. Hope everyone is feeling better soon.

Anonymous said...

Got one word for you, for both of you: Gatorade.
Hope everyone is feeling better.

doubletrouble said...

oh, no...I'm sorry! that sucks! I hope you all feel better soon! we missed you on Sun. at the Higgins.